Mas Tequila Por Favor...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOwf3TDygkM

It's the Holidays and many of us will have a drink or two at Holiday gatherings. Last night I went to a party and realized I had a few too many. I took a cab home. Figured it was the safe thing to do. I just can't remember where I got this fucking cab parked in my driveway.

I was working a Beat last night when I had an encounter with a bum. His skin was dirty and wrinkled. What teeth he had were yellow and tarnished. Time had not been good to him and I would have guessed him to be much older then he was.... Sadly this guy looked like shit He said to me "Hey Officer...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Plz9JxsnhH4

On U.S. 166 Eastbound at Mile Marker 73 just East of Sedan , KS. I asked for her driver's license, registration, and proof of insurance. The lady took out the required information and handed it to me. In with the cards I was somewhat surprised (due to her advanced age) to see she had a conceal...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRzhloqMUFs Mark

There is finally conclusive evidence that Osama bin Laden and Muammar Gaddafi are dead. Yesterday, they both registered to vote in Chicago.

I got behind an elderly gentleman while in line at Walgreens today. He asked the pharmacy guy for one eight of a viagra. The pharmacy guy told him one eight of a viagra would do him no good. He asked him why only one eighth? The elderly gentleman replied..."I'm trying to stop pissing on my shoes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch_popup?v=xdj67XknFrM#t=5

Mark Twain's plan to improve English spelling For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be...

1. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write 'For Marijuana'. 2. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 3. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'. 4. Sing Along At The Opera. 5. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their...

This stuff is funny...http://dontevenreply.com/

This guy hangs out at a B&M I go to Stanza dei Sigari Funny as all hell. http://www.theguyfromboston.net/Rants/2009/CigarBan.html

Found this in a friend's facebook pictures.

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many...

Go the fuck to sleep http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bI6RrDveqm8

- VERY BRAVE MAN JOKES --- How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry It! What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A battery has a positive side.