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Thread: Fancy bar

  1. #1
    makhno Guest

    Default Fancy bar

    A man came home drunk at four in the morning, and his wife was all over him, yelling at him, crying because she thought he was with another woman.

    "No, honey, I swear, I was at this bar, and it was so fancy that even the urinals were made of GOLD!"

    She said she didn't believe him, so she called the bar.

    "Hello," she said, "I just want to ask one question. My husband claims to have spent the night at your bar and I have one question; are your urinals covered in gold?"

    To which she heard the bartender say, "Hey, Clarence, I think we found the guy who pissed in your saxophone!"

  2. #2
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    Yet another old one.

    What is it with you mahinko, you've been a member here for a year and a half and the ONLY posts you ever make are really old jokes you steal off of lame websites (which will NOT be mentioned here, LMFAO!). What gives?

    Did you notice that this is a cigar site?


    EDIT: To remove reference to the lame-assed joke site.
    Last edited by CoventryCat86; 01-26-2010 at 12:32 AM.
    TBSCigars - "On Holiday"
    Grammar - It's the difference between knowing your crap and knowing you're crap.

  3. #3
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    Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

    Har, fuckin' har....

    I found that one on www.jokesformorons.com

    I'm so damned funny I just don't know what to do with my incredible talent. Maybe I'll go sign up on a pachinko site and do nothing but post jokes....
    Last edited by CoventryCat86; 01-26-2010 at 12:52 AM.
    TBSCigars - "On Holiday"
    Grammar - It's the difference between knowing your crap and knowing you're crap.

  4. #4
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    Mahinko, this is for you:
    TBSCigars - "On Holiday"
    Grammar - It's the difference between knowing your crap and knowing you're crap.

  5. #5
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    Lesson learned here, if you get marked with the Red X, you may undergo a transformation from "Junior Member" to "Banned" or in this a$$wipe's case "Guest".
    TBSCigars - "On Holiday"
    Grammar - It's the difference between knowing your crap and knowing you're crap.

  6. #6
    print.out Guest

    Default

    So, I was banned for posting old jokes? I don't know what kind of weed you smoke, but it must be very good.
    I'm not going to visit this site anymore, so you can ban this account as well.

    P.S. BTW, it's makhno, not mahinko, you asshole.

  7. #7
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    Mahi Mahi ....

    More than one account per person is a great reason for a ban, but for you ..... I'm sure they'll give you a two-fer.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by print.out View Post
    So, I was banned for posting old jokes? I don't know what kind of weed you smoke, but it must be very good.
    I'm not going to visit this site anymore, so you can ban this account as well.

    P.S. BTW, it's makhno, not mahinko, you asshole.
    WOW...a classic "you pissed me off, so I am taking my ball and going home" wwwaaaaaahhhh...go home and suck on mommy's tittie.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by print.out View Post
    P.S. BTW, it's makhno, not mahinko, you asshole.
    Makhnomistakeaboutit, wait, mahinko, no, maknhos, no, phucktard....yeah, that's it.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by print.out View Post
    So, I was banned for posting old jokes? I don't know what kind of weed you smoke, but it must be very good.
    I'm not going to visit this site anymore, so you can ban this account as well.

    P.S. BTW, it's makhno, not mahinko, you asshole.
    mahinko - I hear ya, buttercup. You've been awfully integral in our site's success. Your jokes are da bomb! Why would anyone think of banning you!

    BTW - do you by chance smoke cigars??? We never got to ask before you left us so abruptly.

  11. #11
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    (in a goofy cartoon voice) Which way did he go George? Which way did he go?
    Just another day at the office!

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Roger View Post
    (in a goofy cartoon voice) Which way did he go George? Which way did he go?
    I think he went out the door, Roger...

  13. #13
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    A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. The pharmacist promptly reaches out and slaps the man's face.

    "What the heck did you do that for?!!" the man screams.

    "Well, you don't have the hiccups anymore, do you?"

    The man says, "No I don't, but my wife out in the car still does!"


    YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK

    ====================================

    The bride lay in bed on the first night of their honeymoon while her husband stood at the bedroom window, gazing at the stars.

    "Come to bed, darling," she whispered after some time had passed.

    "Not likely," replied the blonde groom, "my mother told me that this would be the best night of my life and I'm not going to miss a minute of it."

    YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK

    =====================================

    A lady lost her handbag in the bustle of Christmas shopping. It was found by an honest little boy and returned to her. Looking in her purse, she commented, "Hmmm... that's funny. When I lost my bag there was a $20 bill in it. Now there are twenty $1 bills."

    The boy quickly replied, "That's right, lady. The last time I found a lady's purse, she didn't have any change for a reward."

    YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK

    =====================================

    There were two blondes who went deep into the frozen woods searching for a Christmas tree.

    After hours of subzero temperatures and a few close calls with hungry wolves, one blonde turned to the other and said, "I'm chopping down the next tree I see. I don't care whether it's decorated or not!"

    YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK

    =====================================

    ...and the funniest one of all...

    HEY MAHINKO (or whoever the hell you are... ) - FUCK OFF!!

    YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK
    Last edited by Shelby07; 01-29-2010 at 07:54 PM. Reason: ...probably a little over the top

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by print.out View Post
    So, I was banned for posting old jokes? I don't know what kind of weed you smoke, but it must be very good.
    I'm not going to visit this site anymore, so you can ban this account as well.

    P.S. BTW, it's makhno, not mahinko, you asshole.

    Okay mahinko, you won't be missed you asshole.
    TBSCigars - "On Holiday"
    Grammar - It's the difference between knowing your crap and knowing you're crap.

  15. #15
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    Awwwww, isn't this sweet?:

    The last 10 visitor(s) to this page were:

    1. ashauler +
    2. badwhale
    3. buzz
    4. Irish79
    5. matt257
    6. MemphisFred
    7. Paddy
    8. print.out
    9. stogieman +
    10. ukyfan

    This page has had 2,925 visits
    I think Mahinko has a crush on me.
    TBSCigars - "On Holiday"
    Grammar - It's the difference between knowing your crap and knowing you're crap.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by CoventryCat86 View Post
    I think Mahinko has a crush on me.
    Ewwwww


    Doesn't that just make you want to bathe with lye soap, a steel wooler scrubber, and a fire hydrant?

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarineOne View Post
    Ewwwww


    Doesn't that just make you want to bathe with lye soap, a steel wooler scrubber, and a fire hydrant?
    ...follow that up with a cup of goat piss and gasoline and that's how I keep likes of people like mahinko away from me...

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