Study On Arkansas Trailer Trash
AN IN DEPTH STUDY OF THE NATIVE SOCIAL STRUCTURE IN THE STATE OF ARKANSAS BY THE OX
In weeks past, I have sent out a e-mail to friends regarding the clothing of a certain "type" of people. In doing my research on the clothing of this "type" of people, I thought to myself, "I wonder what these people are like at home?" So I decided to go and spend a week with what I call the Michelobi Tribe.
When I first pulled up to the trailer park around noon, I was greeted by the chief of the Michelobi tribe, Jamie. I noticed right away the ornate markings that adorned his body.
His initials were tatooed in green between his thumb and forefinger, and the warlock tatoo that was on his right arm let me know that he was also possibly the 'Medicine Man" or "Shamen' of his tribe. He also wore a ornate hat that had some hieroglyphics on it that I was barely able to translate as METALLICA. He also wore cut off pants and blue flip-flops that are custom attire of his kind. The absence of a shirt took me off guard but it didnt suprise me. He took me in to meet his woman who we will call Billie. She was a creature that was a sight to behold. She was about 5 feet tall, 180 lbs., she had black hair and was missing ALL of her top teeth. She was wearing a yellow dreamcatcher shirt and was covered in bed sores. I greeted her and gave her and Jamie a peace offering of toothbrushes and soap. Billie had a eye for decorating. I noticed that the velvet rug painting of the rottweiller went well with the makeshift furniture that consisted of milk crates and a giant spool. They offered me gifts as well. We sat around in a circle and smoked together. But these werent your ordinary cigs. For those of you who know me, know that I have been known from time to time to partake in this nasty habit but I smoke high quality tobbaccos from the rich fertile soil of the Carolinas. The Michelobi tribe inhale what one can only descibe as dried out fodder from the Allen Canning Co. that has been wrapped in Mead notebook paper and has a filter made out of a cotton swab. These brands include CHECKERS ECHO and CHEYENNE. The Michelobis habit is good for the community because it keeps Scripto and Bic in buisiness. When it came time for dinner, I was served a bowl of Cheerios that had chopped up hot dogs and had Wild Turkey poured over it. After I reluctantly ate this concotion and passed out halucinating, I awoke to see Billie breast feeding with one arm and smoking a crack pipe with the other. No doubt she was preparing her child early to be able to handle the rigors of Ritalin ten years down the road. Jamie sat me down and told me that it was time to watch tv. To my suprise, they had a big screen tv with a sattellite system. How they afford this on Gov. assistance is a complete mystery. They had a illegal hookup and had every single channel. One would think that they would use this to their advantage to expand their education but all we did was watch the "American Chopper" marathon. I then went with Jamie on what he called a "beer run". We piled into his 1984 white Olds and went to buy more beer. The cashier at the store was more than happy to exchange his food stamps for cash when we made our purchase. After we returned with the beer we discovered Billie in bed cheating on him with his best friend Steve. A vicious fight broke out and after thirty minutes and a visit by the police, Jamie and Steve patched thing up and decided to get together the next week to watch the Dallas game on tv and drink beer. I decided to cut my visit down from one week to one night and after checking myself into a hospital for a few days for some hepatitis tests I went home knowing that all of my research has not been done in vain but to educate people with knowledge.
