Parents with 9 year olds

My girlfriend's aunt (who I work with) and uncle have a 9 year old with ADD (they've been trying different drugs) and he's got a lot of problems. He's small for his size (all he eats is chik-fil-a and junk food) and he's the rudest little shit I've ever met. Once (after I quit my job which was a temp job anyways) he tells me they fired my ass. He then said the same thing to my girlfriend's best friend (which was fired and she broke down in front of all of us) and the kids parents never apologize and never own up to his mistakes. I heard the mother say "Well she was fired, wasn't she?". I've known this child since he was barely forming words and no, I honest to God can't stand him. I mean, when I see him, I make it a point to avoid him.

Anyone else ever stuck in this type of situation?

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Originally Posted by Kayakinboy

My girlfriend's aunt (who I work with) and uncle have a 9 year old with ADD (they've been trying different drugs) and he's got a lot of problems. He's small for his size (all he eats is chik-fil-a and junk food) and he's the rudest little shit I've ever met. Once (after I quit my job which was a temp job anyways) he tells me they fired my ass. He then said the same thing to my girlfriend's best friend (which was fired and she broke down in front of all of us) and the kids parents never apologize and never own up to his mistakes. I heard the mother say "Well she was fired, wasn't she?". I've known this child since he was barely forming words and no, I honest to God can't stand him. I mean, when I see him, I make it a point to avoid him.

Anyone else ever stuck in this type of situation?

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This kid's parents appear to be absolutely useless sacks of shit, and they appear to be imparting their ways upon (or at least enabling) their child. I would wager that they use "ADD" as an excuse for his behavior (and as a cop-out for their lack of discipline). "Oh, don't worry about our little Junior torturing your dog or cursing your dead grandmother -- he just has ADD." Unfortunately, he's going to grow up undisciplined by his parents, and he's going to be in for a rude wake-up call once he enters the real world.

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Originally Posted by JFellows

This kid's parents appear to be absolutely useless sacks of shit, and they appear to be imparting their ways upon (or at least enabling) their child. I would wager that they use "ADD" as an excuse for his behavior (and as a cop-out for their lack of discipline). "Oh, don't worry about our little Junior torturing your dog or cursing your dead grandmother -- he just has ADD." Unfortunately, he's going to grow up undisciplined by his parents, and he's going to be in for a rude wake-up call once he enters the real world.

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Could not have said it better. That boy needs a good a$$ beatin'

I'm glad others agree with me on this matter. The parents had him late in life, and when he graduates high school the dad will be in his 70s... We've (me and my girlfriend of 5 years) have already been told we'd "inherit" him. That's the part that scares me. :smiley26:

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Originally Posted by Bassfever

Could not have said it better. That boy needs a good a$$ beatin'

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Damn tootin'!!!!!!

Ya know, I don't believe in beating the absolute shit out of anyone or anything, but IMHO, 1/2 or more of the problems with kids these days is they've never gotten an open handed slap across the face, or a leather belt across the ass.

That is a sad situation to be put in. I agree that it is almost completely the parents doing. They have actually passively encouraged that type of behavior by actively ignoring it, at least thats the way it seems to most kids, even more so to those with ADD.

There are plenty of people (adults even) with ADD out there that are just fine. My little sister (freshman in HS) has ADD bad, but my parents work with her. My wife had ADHD as a kid and that's even worse, and she turned out OK in the end. :smiley1:

If you do end up having to spend a lot of time with him, just be patient and remember that its not entirely his fault.

my $0.02

spiffy

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Originally Posted by Newfie

Damn tootin'!!!!!!

Ya know, I don't believe in beating the absolute shit out of anyone or anything, but IMHO, 1/2 or more of the problems with kids these days is they've never gotten an open handed slap across the face, or a leather belt across the ass.

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<Shudder>

My dad was partial to the back of a big ol' flat wooden brush. This was basically a paddle with bristles. :smiley19:

spiffy

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Originally Posted by JFellows

This kid's parents appear to be absolutely useless sacks of shit, and they appear to be imparting their ways upon (or at least enabling) their child. I would wager that they use "ADD" as an excuse for his behavior (and as a cop-out for their lack of discipline). "Oh, don't worry about our little Junior torturing your dog or cursing your dead grandmother -- he just has ADD." Unfortunately, he's going to grow up undisciplined by his parents, and he's going to be in for a rude wake-up call once he enters the real world.

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:smiley20:

I'd like to take this chance to tell my parents THANK YOU:smiley32::smiley32:. Without going into a lot of detail, I wasn't the most well behaved child (not extreme either), while I hated them then, I now am amazed on how well they taught me life's lessons. Parenting is not an easy task which I learned and am still learning. I'm not afraid to say that I have had my share of beatings at the hands of both my parents, I am still afraid of my Dad to this day, but there are not words to describe how much I fear the wrath of my Mom....all 5' 1" and 100lbs of her.:smiley27:

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Originally Posted by Kayakinboy

My girlfriend's aunt (who I work with) and uncle have a 9 year old with ADD (they've been trying different drugs) and he's got a lot of problems. He's small for his size (all he eats is chik-fil-a and junk food) and he's the rudest little shit I've ever met. Once (after I quit my job which was a temp job anyways) he tells me they fired my ass. He then said the same thing to my girlfriend's best friend (which was fired and she broke down in front of all of us) and the kids parents never apologize and never own up to his mistakes. I heard the mother say "Well she was fired, wasn't she?". I've known this child since he was barely forming words and no, I honest to God can't stand him. I mean, when I see him, I make it a point to avoid him.

Anyone else ever stuck in this type of situation?

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That sounds exactly like my wife's aunt and uncle except their kid is 18. He's a little piece of shit that refuses to bath and is about 100 pounds overweight that is in his 5th year of highschool but they refuse to put him on ADD meds because it will disrupt his creativity. That little bastard hasn't created a damn thing ever except a headache.

I was whipped when I was bad, until I got older, then I was grounded for a week or more per offense, which prompted me to ask for the whippings to return.

But I learned that actions have consequences, and that's what all kids should learn and learn quick, or else they turn out to be adult turds who go on the internet and melt down, troll, and become slack-jawed, drooling stooges sent in to gum up the works wherever they may tread.

I really think there should be a test people have to take a test to become parents.
I am glad my parents beat my a$$ when I was younger and needed a good whoopin.

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Originally Posted by Newfie

Damn tootin'!!!!!!

Ya know, I don't believe in beating the absolute shit out of anyone or anything, but IMHO, 1/2 or more of the problems with kids these days is they've never gotten an open handed slap across the face, or a leather belt across the ass.

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My thoughts exactly. I have heard of a bill for a ban against spanking your kinds the the SF area. That is some of the most retard ideas I've ever heard off. But it goes to show you that people are becoming pussys (wasn't going to write it but then I felt like one). If my kid is anything like me growing up, he is going to feel the open side of my hand often, but like my grand parents, my parents and myself, he will grow up right and so will his kids. Kids have been getting slapped, spanked and the belt for ages. To think that its now time to change those forms of punishment is ludacris. It obviously worked, and we have all managed to survive it and become responsible adults.

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Originally Posted by Kayakinboy

He's small for his size (all he eats is chik-fil-a and junk food)

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Having suffered from allergy (food colouring) related hyperactivity as a child, which would most likely be put down to ADD nowadays I have mixed feelings on this topic.

The way I see it is that all children need discipline in their lives, and if you leave it to late then the required level of discipline gets greater.

I generally get an urge to hit the parents of some of these kids, cause in most cases that is where the fault lies. If you feed your kid shit what's he gonna be full of?

He only eats junk food because they LET him do it. Hunger is a powerful motivator. Present the kids with healthy food. They will refuse it until the survival instinct takes over. If they will literally starve themselves for a significant period of time and lose significant weight, then there's a problem that should be medically addressed.

It's certainly possible that he has ADD, but even if he has it, that means the parents have to work harder to get the same results, not use it as an excuse for bad behavior.

I thought I was a fairly tough parent until I got married to my second wife and realized I was an amateur. She has high standards, and as time goes on, I begin to appreciate them.

My son doesn't really want to visit me anymore because he can't get away with crap at my house. He can't sneak out at night because we have an alarm system. He can't sneak cigarrettes out the window because we have smoke alarms in all the rooms. I'm not scared to search for, and confiscate contraband. We won't let him stay on the computer and/or phone all day/night long. I keep tabs on his phone calls, email, and he's not allowed to lock himself in his room. (We had that particular battle and I almost had to remove the door to his room before he accepted it. I was standing there with my power drill and asked him if I needed to do it or not.) If he leaves the house, he has to take either a radio or cell phone with him. I check him every morning to make sure he has bathed, brushed teeth, put on fresh acceptable clothing, and kept his room in reasonable order.

The discipline he gets at his mom's makes me angry. She's seperated again and living with another guy. He's allowed to get terrible grades. He barely passed and she's sending him on the Washington DC trip. I refused to pay for it and made it known I thought he hadn't earned the privilege. She's going to let him get his drivers license as early as possible. He's sneaking around and sleeping with his girlfriend a lot because he seems to be unsupervised and unchaperoned while with her. The boy just needs supervision, motivation, and discipline. Apparently, she's more concerned about whether he "likes" her better than me, than what's good for him.

All of this wouldn't make me so angry if the court didn't take him from me to give her because they felt her's was the better home.

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Originally Posted by Newfie

Damn tootin'!!!!!!

Ya know, I don't believe in beating the absolute shit out of anyone or anything, but IMHO, 1/2 or more of the problems with kids these days is they've never gotten an open handed slap across the face, or a leather belt across the ass.

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I would have to agree. When I was little if I were to have done something like that my mom would have come after me with a belt! To this day I say my mom was like Indiana Jones with a belt. I couldn't tell you how many times I got that or a tree switch!

And having ADD/ ADHD is no excuse. I have it and I never acted that bad in front of others. Because I knew if I did, my mom would have the belt waiting on me when we got home!

Not sure if they still sell them because of the peta people but there used to be a shock collar for dogs that worked on a push button. It was designed for field training of hunting dogs and had a variable setting. I'm sure you could strap it to the kid's ankle or something.

I am glad to see that I am not the only one who believes in Good Discipline. I personally believe that most cases of ADD/ADHD are directly related to the lack of discipline. It was not until I got older that I realized that all the ass whuppins I got put my brain in gear. I have asked most of the people I know, who have 'ADD' kids if they had their ass whipped as a kid and most respond "Hell yeah!" Then I ask them if they whip their kids and they respond with "Hell No!". Followed by some line about not wanting to put their kids thruogh what they went through. I draw my own conclusions from that. I am also tired of hearing that everything is a disease these days. I think it is just some pansy ass trying to justify themself. Okay that's my two cents worth and then some.:smiley37:

I remember being sent out back to cut my own switches when I was a boy. Didn't take but a few to learn. A little pain early on probably saved me alot later.