If nothing is better than complete happiness in life, than how is a ham sandwich better than nothing? :smiley40:
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If nothing is better than complete happiness in life, than how is a ham sandwich better than nothing? :smiley40:
My head hurts. Just what I needed after an intensive day at work.:smiley36:Quote:
Originally Posted by Shelby07
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii??
Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
and when I SHIP a package.... why do the bastards put it on a TRUCK?
Why do people say they are taking a shit when they are actually leaving one?
I'm still thinking about the ham sandwich.
how do you get a one armed pollock out of a tree ?:smiley36:
Shotgun?Quote:
Originally Posted by dustinpollock
Offer him an Acid?
Climb up and ask him to "LEAF"?
Leave him up there until he turns red and yellow, and he'll fall on his own?
Offer him an Acid?
you have acids?................... shit i just fell :smiley36: you just wait d i have your addy :smiley44:
dustin
why do we call the player a running back if he runs forward?
If a man was alone in the woods with no woman around and he said something, would he still be wrong?
Would the man care?Quote:
Originally Posted by Shelby07
How ya doing, Mark?
HA! He probably wouldn't even notice!Quote:
Originally Posted by NullSmurf
Doing good, Bruce.
A man was to be sentenced, and the judge told him, "You may make a statement. If it is true, I'll sentence you to four years in prison. If it is false, I'll sentence you to six years in prison." After the man made his statement, the judge decided to let him go free. What did the man say?
"I still have the negatives."Quote:
Originally Posted by drew_goring
Why do light switches say "off" on them?
:smiley36::smiley36:Quote:
Originally Posted by ashauler
Not quite.
"You're going to sentence me to 6 years in prison."Quote:
Originally Posted by drew_goring
Somebody else can explain it... my head hurts!
Why doesn't it tickle when you tickle yourself??
If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
Do Lipton Tea employees take "coffee breaks?"
Ah, post padding at it's finest! One more:
Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive?
YES.....that or join the Navy.Quote:
Originally Posted by slcraiders
What happens if someone scares you half to death.. TWICE?
Does it bother anyone that doctors call what they do their "practice"?
If a mute child swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?