Dear Santa,

Please don't hold your experience with another Irish household against me.. I know the Murphy's and Steve is usually a pleasant enough chap, unless he hits the Bushmills too hard. And his wife Sue just loves old fashioned candles. Traditionalists. But Santa, you didn't help yourself when you passed gas coming in the window...

I promise not to set any Santa traps this year, but I still have images etched in my mind of your pasty white, wrinkled & pimply arse w/ a "Vixen was here" tat from when I was young and you thought it would be funny to moon me while I was asleep. Therapy was worth it though.

I love peanut butter, so one out of two ain't bad. As for the smoke, I'll let you surprise me. For the holiday beverage, I have been on a bourbon kick recently. But I trust your judgement as to whatever will best complement the blunt.

Thanks Santa!
Irish79