Ok, I spent all night last night coming up with this one. Sorry Kevin, I had to use you because you and Mark are the only ones I have done a deal with, and "Mark" only has one syllable...

[clearing throat]

You know Basil, and Corvin, and Roham, and Hefty...
Badwhale, and Roger, and Rugby, and Cinda...
but do you recall...
the most famous cigarsmoker of all?

Kevin the crazy smoker (smoker),
has over a thousand posts (wow that's a lot).
most of which are completely usable (usable),
for punchlines to awesome jokes (like the knock-knock ones).

All of the asshat users (users),
seem to atract his witty slang (like "princess").
They never seem to learn that (learn that),
dumb posts receive more shame (stop crying babies).

Then one day Santa appeared,
brought up some posts and swoosh (uh oh Santa)!
Kevin took notice and he replied,
"thats some funny shit there santadouche".

All of the CS members (members),
smiled, grinned and laughed with glee (hee hee).
They'll always appreciate Kevin (Kevin),
and his hilarious commentary (and he's the nice one)!

Thanks for the contest!
-Buzz