View Poll Results: What brands of cigars do you smoke?

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  • Partagas

    5 55.56%
  • Padron

    4 44.44%
  • Arturo F.

    7 77.78%
  • Punch

    5 55.56%
  • Larrañaga

    3 33.33%
  • Cohiba

    4 44.44%
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Thread: “Smoking cigars as an art form"

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  1. #1

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    Quote Originally Posted by ggiese View Post
    Sadly, I haven't been getting much smoking time lately...

    I now occupy my days writing essays for the likes of Daisy. Here's something I quickly scribbled together last night, while I was counting sheep...

    Reading this post won't be the easiest thing you've ever done, but it may be one of the most rewarding. Some background is in order: Daysiartpainter does not merely use threats of fiscal (not "physical") harm to coerce antisocial personæ non gratæ into nailing people to trees. She does so consciously, deliberately, willfully, and methodically. For the sake of concreteness, you may find it instructive to contrast the things I like with the things that she likes. I like listening to music. Daysiartpainter likes gumming up what were once great ideas. I like kittens and puppies. Daysiartpainter likes leading an active disinformation campaign. I like spending time with friends (that goes for you too, BigMac). Daysiartpainter likes threatening anyone who's bold enough to state that she has made it known that she fully intends to create a kind of psychic pain at the very root of the modern mind. If those words don't scare you, nothing will. If they are not a clear warning, I don't know what could be.

    How I pity Daysiartpainter if I were to be her judge. I would start by notifying the jury that I should note that if Daysiartpainter had two brain cells to rub together, she'd realize that her criticisms promote a redistribution of wealth. This is always an appealing proposition for Daysiartpainter's deputies because much of the redistributed wealth will undoubtedly end up in the hands of the redistributors as a condign reward for their loyalty to Daysiartpainter. Daysiartpainter makes a living out of frotteurism. I call this tactic of hers "entrepreneurial frotteurism". Daysiartpainter and her partisans have indisputably raised entrepreneurial frotteurism to a fine art by using it to dismantle the family unit. Even if I were, as she seems to think I am, a brown-nosing kook, at least I know better than to rub salt into our wounds. In contrast, Daysiartpainter is extraordinarily brazen. We've all known that for a long time. However, her willingness to degrade, divide, and destroy our forum sets a new record for brazenness.

    On a more pedestrian level, every so often, Daysiartpainter tries declaring that it's okay if her conclusions initially cause our quality of life to degrade because "sometime", "someone" will do "something" "somehow" to counteract that trend. Whenever she gets caught doing so she raises a terrific hullabaloo calculated to utilize legal, above-ground organizing in combination with illegal, underground tactics to anesthetize the human spirit. She has been trying to popularize the narrative that the health effects of secondhand smoke are not negligible. My fear is that if she's successful at promoting such cockamamy notions then even the man on the Clapham omnibus may agree to let her give voice, in a totally emotional and non-rational way, to her deep-rooted love of teetotalism. Now that you've read this pos, let me challenge you, the reader, not just to help me make Daysiartpainter's ridiculous publications understood, resisted, and made the object of deserved contempt by young and old alike, but also to educate others about what I've written.
    Since we are all about translating things, can someone translate this into English for me? I'm an engineer, my linguistic skills (is that even correct usage?) aren't as amazing as George's...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    1,935

    Default

    I can one up you George http://www.elsewhere.org/pomo/

    I don't even have to type anymore. Just copy and paste.
    "If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair." -C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Precipitously close to disaster.
    Posts
    7,007

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    Quote Originally Posted by Daigz View Post
    Since we are all about translating things, can someone translate this into English for me? I'm an engineer, my linguistic skills (is that even correct usage?) aren't as amazing as George's...
    You know what they say about arguing with a moron, right? "Never argue with a moron - they'll bring you to their level and beat you with experience." <author unknown>

    Of course I subscribe to the philosophy, "Never argue with an idiot. The best outcome you can hope for is that you won an argument with an idiot."
    <Anonymous>

    So... In the interim - that dissertation, my friend, is as close to writing absolutely nothing as one dares go...

  4. Default

    Never wrestle with pigs. The pigs love it and all you do is get dirty. Damn flatlanders never get anything right.

    Doc.
    Do draft dodgers have reunions? And if so what do they talk about?
    Doc

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Sunny Florida, north of Tampa
    Posts
    219
    Blog Entries
    1

    Default

    If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
    Scott Adams

    Common sense is not so common.
    Voltaire
    "Those are like the holy grail of cigars. Indiana Jones and the search for Argenicadomipanurans"
    -Denver24

    "Your telling me I need to segregate my grape flavored blunts from the sour apple ones?"
    -Mangyrat

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