View Poll Results: Vote for you favorite author:

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  • cinda

    0 0%
  • buzz

    2 22.22%
  • mrtr33

    1 11.11%
  • Lopaka

    0 0%
  • EGQ

    2 22.22%
  • heftysmokes

    4 44.44%
  • badwhale

    0 0%
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Thread: Christmas Writing Contest 2010

  1. #21
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    Default

    would have come sooner
    but there's no dvd prize
    no motivation

    the "who am I?" Haikus. Feel free to guess.

    goes to Mexico
    plays with steel balls in large tubes
    calls Castle on Me?

    is NEVER offline
    our own handmade bully but
    yuengling isn't beer

    started as a project
    after building kiln it's now
    full-fledged addiction

    most relatives here
    has a cool beer label bar
    yet he still don't surf

    now he's an admin
    surviving Jackson's assholes
    nice move on HP

    a bit addicted
    spends six months in Mexico
    now watches grandkids!

    I'm glad this Canuk
    has a new girlfriend but what
    IS that avatar?

    can't grow tobacco
    in florida but stalks
    wooden indians

    he is a daddy
    had pizza shop on tv
    media noche whore

    assures quality
    been in the woods since August
    using tapatalk

    chicago bulldog
    whose little girl hates us all
    she'll fit right in here


    my apologies
    to the brothers I have missed
    diapers need changing





    Highlights from the past year:

    crazi paints pictures
    was nice enough to condense
    crazi in one thread

    thanks for your service
    but now you're a contractor
    who wants free cigars

    the eight day wonder
    who already knows everything
    a Davidoff fan

    *just added*
    will not do research
    we're the "kids" for helping AND
    he's from Michigan


    Age Quod Agis

    1 Strike

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mrtr33 View Post
    would have come sooner
    but there's no dvd prize
    no motivation

    the "who am I?" Haikus. Feel free to guess.

    goes to Mexico
    plays with steel balls in large tubes
    calls Castle on Me?
    Buzz

    is NEVER offline
    our own handmade bully but
    yuengling isn't beer
    not sure...

    started as a project
    after building kiln it's now
    full-fledged addiction
    ashauler

    most relatives here
    has a cool beer label bar
    yet he still don't surf
    heftysmokes

    now he's an admin
    surviving Jackson's assholes
    nice move on HP
    cigarsarge

    a bit addicted
    spends six months in Mexico
    now watches grandkids!
    Paddy

    I'm glad this Canuk
    has a new girlfriend but what
    IS that avatar?
    craig

    can't grow tobacco
    in florida but stalks
    wooden indians
    Smoked!

    he is a daddy
    had pizza shop on tv
    media noche whore
    logan37

    assures quality
    been in the woods since August
    using tapatalk
    BIGWHITEASH!!!!

    chicago bulldog
    whose little girl hates us all
    she'll fit right in here
    egq

    my apologies
    to the brothers I have missed
    diapers need changing





    Highlights from the past year:

    crazi paints pictures
    was nice enough to condense
    crazi in one thread
    Daysitheartpainter

    thanks for your service
    but now you're a contractor
    who wants free cigars
    mooch1

    the eight day wonder
    who already knows everything
    a Davidoff fan
    savior

    *just added*
    will not do research
    we're the "kids" for helping AND
    he's from Michigan
    cockchoke
    The powers that be might take it all away
    Together we burn, together we burn away

    Uncle Tupelo

  3. #23
    Join Date
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    Default

    tonight....Dec 24th... have till then....


    The powers that be might take it all away
    Together we burn, together we burn away

    Uncle Tupelo

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Billings MT
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    Default

    Roller skates

    I was eight years old and Santa brought me roller skates. They were low-top, royal-blue suede with white faux-adidas stripes and red wheels. The big "brake"--that knob that sticks out the front--was blue as well, and if you drug it along the sidewalk it would leave a trail. My sister and I got matching skates and when the weather got warmer, we'd have contests to see who could drag brake and leave a longer blue streak down the street in front of our house.

    Twenty seven years later, and that's the one gift that I remember; the one that resonates in my heart when I think about Christmas' past: the toy that stands out in my hazy memory. When I think of my older sister it's inevitable those damn roller skates sitting there under the tree will eventually make an appearance in my mind.

    Don't get me wrong, I have a ton of fantastic Christmas memories...
    -sitting at the "kids table" with all of my cousins, getting whacked in the back of the head with a serving spoon for screwing around during grace,
    -the year my uncle got so drunk he passed out on the living room floor and my Grandpa told my five year old self to stick an ice cube down his (very festive) turtleneck sweater,
    -eating so much of my Grandma's lefse I spent most of one Christmas eve throwing up while everyone else played games,
    -ten hour road trips across the state, excitement building the closer we got to my grandparent's house,
    -eating
    -eating
    -Did I mention eating? All of those fantastic meals made by the Norwegian Grandmother one year and the German Grandmother the next.

    I know, I know...what's my point?

    I have a six year old boy now. He's two short years from my "year of the roller skates." There are literally dozens of presents for him under the tree from all of the grandparents and aunts and uncles living nearby, but only two from his parents. His mom crocheted him a really cool dinosaur stocking cap and his dad got him a Swiss Army knife.

    My hope...when he's a little closer to 40 than 30 (as I am now) he'll think back to all of his past holiday seasons and remember that awesome hat his mom took the time to make for him. He'll remember the year when 5 grandparents and 3 great grandparents all sat together and ate too much prime rib and mashed potatoes. He'll remember using empty gift wrap rolls to sword fight with his little sister. My hope is he remembers all of the love in his house at Christmas time, not all of the presents.

    I wish all of my cigarsmoker brothers (and sister!) a very happy holiday season, filling their homes with love, their man-caves with cigar smoke, and their stomach's with good food and better booze (but not too much or an unwelcome ice cube might make an appearance).

    Merry Christmas, douchenozzles!

    "...all roads lead to cigars."
    -Cinda
    "You will not change this forum. Simple as that. Accept it or move on, or you will be escorted from the premises."
    -Shagaroo
    "Maybe you should just stop trying to be witty?"
    -Ashauler
    "Rule 17: Don’t turn your back on bears, men you have wronged, or the dominant turkey during mating season."
    -Dwight Schrute
    "Fuck I just like smoking. Who am I kidding?"
    -Badwhale
    "If you want to start a fuckin' hobby, start it."
    -Shelby07

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    That much further west
    Posts
    2,420

    Default

    Aaron, that story simply rocked! Thank you for sharing. I have been lacking the X-mas spirit this year on so many levels. Reading your story, instilled a much needed message that strips everything down being in community with one-another. It also brought back that cheerful spirit I was missing.. ..and just in time.

    I am singing!!!
    Mama said a lot of things and be thankful was the one she never minded saying twice

    --Drive-By Truckers

  6. #26
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    Default

    I started typing up a more sophisticated poem, but I got about 2 lines into it and realized I don’t have the gumption tonight. Plus, between Hefty’s thoughtful / meaningful post, buzz & mrtr33s haiku blitzkrieg, and EGQ’s kid cute-ing up the thread, I don’t stand snowball’s chance in hell…so:

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Merry Christmas to the cigarsmokers’ crew!

    Merry Christmas everyone! Smoke what you like, and I’ll spend the rest of this seegar contemplating another year’s worth of interaction & friendship on our cigar board!

    Will
    The powers that be might take it all away
    Together we burn, together we burn away

    Uncle Tupelo

  7. #27
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    Sep 2006
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    Default Get your votes in

    The poll is posted to this thread.

    Thanks to all who posted!

    And a big thanks to all of you for making this place what it is.

    We'll do it again next year.

  8. #28
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    Sep 2006
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    Wichita, KS
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    Default

    Congratulations go out to heftysmokes!!!!

    I think I have your addy around here somewhere, so I'll get the prize package out in the next couple of days.

    Thanks to all who participated, and we'll see ya again next year!!

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Tucson, AZ
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    Default

    Congrats Aaron! Thanks for the contest Jamie, I'm already getting some haiku's ready for next year.

    -Buzz
    Quote Originally Posted by badwhale View Post
    Buzz is smoking our cigars. This probably is his triumphant scam.

  10. #30
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    Congrats Aaron and the blue streaks! Nicely done.

    Thanks for the contest, Jamie!


    Age Quod Agis

    1 Strike

  11. #31
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Billings MT
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    Thanks, guys.

    "...all roads lead to cigars."
    -Cinda
    "You will not change this forum. Simple as that. Accept it or move on, or you will be escorted from the premises."
    -Shagaroo
    "Maybe you should just stop trying to be witty?"
    -Ashauler
    "Rule 17: Don’t turn your back on bears, men you have wronged, or the dominant turkey during mating season."
    -Dwight Schrute
    "Fuck I just like smoking. Who am I kidding?"
    -Badwhale
    "If you want to start a fuckin' hobby, start it."
    -Shelby07

  12. #32
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    New England-GO Red Sox's!
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    Default

    Congrats Hefty!






    http://www.cmt.com/videos/eric-churc...le-smoke.jhtml?

    "Do this...go to Google and type in "Dumbass that can't take a hint"...notice the picture of a big feller in his Moms kitchen with a can of Wannabe RockStar on his man boob...Hey, that's you!" TheGreekTitan





    May God grant us the wisdom to discover right, the will to


    choose it, and the strength


    to make it endure










  13. #33
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    Default

    9101 0105 2129 7450 5588 32 is on it's way!! My apologies for the delay.

  14. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by ashauler View Post
    9101 0105 2129 7450 5588 32 is on it's way!! My apologies for the delay.
    Hefty said he's running low on Acid Blondies...
    The powers that be might take it all away
    Together we burn, together we burn away

    Uncle Tupelo

  15. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by badwhale View Post
    Hefty said he's running low on Acid Blondies...
    Well, I'm sure he'll have different issues once he gets this package. I'm kinda concerned about the package though. I was running out of tape and didn't have another roll handy. I sure hope it stays intact.

  16. #36
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    Got my package yesterday!

    Thanks Jamie, your generosity to the board is much appreciated.

    "...all roads lead to cigars."
    -Cinda
    "You will not change this forum. Simple as that. Accept it or move on, or you will be escorted from the premises."
    -Shagaroo
    "Maybe you should just stop trying to be witty?"
    -Ashauler
    "Rule 17: Don’t turn your back on bears, men you have wronged, or the dominant turkey during mating season."
    -Dwight Schrute
    "Fuck I just like smoking. Who am I kidding?"
    -Badwhale
    "If you want to start a fuckin' hobby, start it."
    -Shelby07

  17. #37
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
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    Default

    I'm glad they got there safely since I didn't "tape the poop" out of it this time.

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