Look... I really, really want to help you, because you're in desparate need. Let me see if I can answer your questions for you, but please take my comments with the candid frankness you need at this point...
So ask yourself - is this about YOU or is this about the cigar smoking community? Because, quite frankly, if it's about the cigar smoking community you would not be posting links to your website trying to draw people away from an established cigar discussion community. Your fledgling venture has all sorts of 'issues' - not the least of which it's completely obvious you're brand new to this. It would seem to me you'd be "studying" right now - not trying to jump into something you don't have any skill at...
That's completely obvious! (read my answer in the above question)
Let's just say - In fairness and being complete objective I would personally grade it in the C-/D+ range because there was at least some effort put forth, but not much else. For the rest of the answer, I'd submit it to a professional writer for a more formal critique. Bottom line - it's just not 'grabbing' the audience. You have a ways to go to get there.
Are you not trying to be an authority? So then what is your purpose for writing the article and trying to divert membership to your site? After all - if you're not an authority how would you be able to monetize your site?
May I make a suggestion... before you continue down the path of "monetizing" your cigar knowledge - watch the movie "Jiro Dreams of Sushi" (it's currently running on Netflix). Jiro Ono should be an inspiration to you - he created a 10-seat, sushi-only restaurant inauspiciously located in a Tokyo subway station and has been awarded a prestigious three-star Michelin Guide rating. His story can be used to inspire success for anyone doing anything. Listen to Jiro's suggestions about being successful. Study it - understand it - and you will have success...
You, personally, really need to make it past the first thing required of apprentices. Can you commit yourself to squeezing the towels pulled from the boiling water before you move on in your success journey? [HINT: Jiro's apprentices understand and gladly squeeze scalding hot towels to gain the knowledge Jiro has. They also understand it would be completely foolish to set up a sushi shop next door and ask Jiro's customers to come to their restaurant]
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