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Thread: Crow kills

  1. #1
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    Default Crow kills

    Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.

    However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

    MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

    The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck."

    Absolutely amazing!

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    Quote Originally Posted by ggiese View Post
    Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.

    However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

    MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

    The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck."

    Absolutely amazing!
    I am ashamed of myself for lol-ing at this. Well done.

  3. #3
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    In almost all parts of North America "kahkis" are pants, in eastern Massachusetts, they are little metal instruments you insert into the ignition switch to start your automobile.

    Well done George.
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    Did you help with the reconstruction of the tragic accidents?

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by cigarsarge View Post
    Did you help with the reconstruction of the tragic accidents?
    LOL Nope! I don't believe any truckers were harmed as the result of this situation - only crows...

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    Cannot believe I wasted that much time to read this. lol Pretty good George.
    May your ashes be long and your smoke be plentiful...

  7. #7
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    Speaking of crows, this is what I found at the Grand Canyon: Crows come in all shapes and sizes!


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  8. #8
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    Great joke GG and I can tell it at work!






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