Join us for the inaugural Herf and Surf event in Salt Lake City next Saturday evening. This gathering is sure to be huge so R.S.V.P. asap. Johnny G. from the Brethren of the 12 is hosting along with his 7 wives. World renowned cigar maker Levi Smith will be present introducing his new line – The “Mormon Maduro”- rated a 93 by Conservative Insider Magazine!

$69 per person will get you 6 cigars (the number six is based on the average number of children in a Utah household), a Turf Dinner- Brine Shrimp Scampi- fresh from the Great Salt Lake accompanied by Funeral Potatoes and Green Jello Salad (both local favorites). Music will be provided by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir with a guest appearance from Donny Osmond himself.

Since smoking is not allowed in any public places, we will gather in Latter Day Larry’s backyard to conclude this wonderful evening. Raffle prizes include several home-spun quilts, two pigs, one lamb and a circa 1867 chastity belt.

Let me know if anyone needs a ride. My neighbor has a sweet mini-van that will hold 7 people.