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Thread: Musings

  1. #1

    Default Musings

    Just thought I would share a few of mine.

    I was cutting the grass for the first time this season and kept hittig cigars butts that were tossed over the deck and in the front yard during the winter. This made me think that perhaps I was way too far into the cigar thing. Then I was at the post office mailing a package and started to amuse myself with this cigar thing, came home and typed out a few things that are along the lines of "you know you're a redneck when......."

    I hope some people enjoy the musings and if you add to them it would be fun also.

    Disclaimer:
    I sincerely wish that this doesn't offend anyone and the intent is just to have fun with personal observations. Also, if it has been done before I am sorry do to it again and I apologize to whoever started the thread before. I did not reaseach to find out so I am ignorant as regards any previous threads.

    Anyway just wanted to have a little fun with this and "You know you are way too far into the cigar thing when.........

    The primary source of fertilizer in your yard is decaying cigar butts.

    When you think the 8 pack of clear plastic boxing tape from Sam's is a small package item.

    When you think the postal employee with the big ass is starting to look good, so you start smiling back.

    When you have an account with USPS on line and the address book is full.

    When you think you might understand the term “asshat”.

    When your wife thinks you belong to a secret gay society.

    You have a second credit card just for overseas purchases.

    You pay the kid next door to check on you humidors when you leave town.

    Your pay $75.00 for a cigar you never intend to smoke.

    There are 3 delivery trucks at your door at the same time (and the one you really wanted to see isn’t there yet).

    You know where all the cigar shops are and at least pretend to be friends with all the owners even though you think some of them are DWE's (dicks with ears).

    A yard gar is a gardening tool.

    When someone asks you what goes good with a cigar and you don’t answer “pussy”.

    A decoy is a cheap cigar strategically placed on top of the travel humidor for the non-initiated because you hate to waste a good one on them.

    There are burn marks in you suits and it’s “OK”.

    Being bombed has nothing to do with drinking.

    Bombing is good.

    You can tell ring gauge within 1 by sight.

    You even know what ring gauge is.

    A quarter is a highly calibrated measuring device used in photos.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    In a van, down by the river!
    Posts
    1,658

    Default

    ...You refuse to go into half the Pubs and Resturants in town because they allow cigarettes but not Cigars.
    "smoking is one of the greatest and cheapest enjoyments in life,
    and if you decide in advance not to smoke, I can only feel sorry for you."-Sigmund Freud


    "The problem with the world is that we draw the circle of our family too small" - Mother Teresa

    “The basic difference between an ordinary man and a warrior is that a warrior takes everything as a challenge while an ordinary man takes everything either as a blessing or a curse” – Carlos Casteneda

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    In a van, down by the river!
    Posts
    1,658

    Default

    ...you enjoy the dirty looks garnered from your cigar smoking.


    ...you check all your online sources of cigars nightly to see if they got those rare cigars you want yet.
    Last edited by Roham; 04-15-2006 at 02:47 AM.
    "smoking is one of the greatest and cheapest enjoyments in life,
    and if you decide in advance not to smoke, I can only feel sorry for you."-Sigmund Freud


    "The problem with the world is that we draw the circle of our family too small" - Mother Teresa

    “The basic difference between an ordinary man and a warrior is that a warrior takes everything as a challenge while an ordinary man takes everything either as a blessing or a curse” – Carlos Casteneda

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