LoudPipes78!!!

[Secret Santa]

Yo, 'ssupp Bro!!!

OK, let's cut to the chase. You've been nothing but a shit disturber all year, and every year previous in your life, so the only thing I can say is Santa has to send you something so you won't start whining and put more bother on that saint you call a wife. Hell, that woman makes Saints seem like evil ghouls!!!

OK, enough about her.

Listen dude, just because Santa's spent the last day & a half browsing and studying the Wish List thread for shit that ain't there doesn't mean I can read your mind and know what you want. For Christ's sake, why don't you people put your preferences and likes in your profile?? You could at least try to make it easy on me. It ain't bad enough I have to guess what kind of mood the Missus is in every morning before I open my eyes, when those elves are having their next Union meeting or when the Reindeer are gonna go into heat, but now every year you guys figure I have nothing better to do than play a seegar guessing game!!!

Fuggitt, when I go by Sid's on my way to snowless Florida (reminds me, gotta put the wheel conversion kit on my sleigh to get to that shit-hole) I'll rob his secret stash of Macanoodles, swing by Mauied's place to scam some of whatever shit they smoke where he's from, go by Basil's place to pick up some Grape White owls and snag some Acid Kuba Kuba off Hex, then I'll have a bag full of shit to drop down your chimney.



So, make it easy for me and let poor old Santa know what your smoking preferences are!!

Ho, ho, ho!!!

[basil]

LOL!!! Well, I don't live near Florida, BUT, I just got a new shipment of pineapple white owls in and I got some grapes left and somethin' called chocolate blunts and I can hook you up! I'll mail 'em on down to Hex!

[Loudpipes78]

I was waiting for my thread... knew I was going to be on the naughty list and not in that gay scritching furry way like ChefChris.

Honestly my preference lately is anything Rocky Patel... I haven't had a cigar from them that I didn't love except the Sun Grown, it was good but... eh

Edge, '90, '92, '99, Old Worlde Reserve, Connecticut (is there actually any difference b/w that and the '99 other than an extra band) are all quite Bueno to me.

But to narrow it down more... I'd probably go with the Edge, '90, and '92 OWR is great but not tons and tons better then the '90 or '92 for the money.

I'm such a newb to all this that no matter what may show up I'll probably thoroughly enjoy, unlike some other things I'm pretty easy to please when it comes to smokes.


And out of that whole rant the one thing you got dead on was that my wife is a Saint, I most definitely married up.


One thing that is definitely on my wish list is an ISOM... I hear so much about them I'm really curious to try one to see what all the hype is.

[guado]

I heard his favorite "flavor" is peach....

[Loudpipes78]

Are you still watching Santa?

I swear I've been really good the last few weeks but I don't know how much longer I can keep it going.

[Secret Santa]

Yeah Dude, I'm still watching. You may wish I wasn't though!!! He he he
Hey, I've been in contact with your pal Guado to see if he was serious that you preferred peach flavored. Suuuuuuup wit dat shit Man??

Anyway, different strokes for different folks, whatever blows yer hair back, ya know, all that stuff.

So ya like the Patel sticks, eh?? Think yer man enough to handle an Edge Lite?? They're pretty strong smokes for a young'un ya know!!! I'll have to see what the elves have laying around from that place. Also, you want to try some of the product from that place you ain't supposed to have any from?? Well, it just so happens that the North Pole is fairly close to Canada where they're legal. Just have to get 'em under the Customs radar, if ya know what I mean.

OK, we got you covered. How about the Saint you sleep with. What does she like? I sure as hell ain't sending you something without sending her something too. I mean, she might leave a little treat for Santa. You; you'll probably just be sawing logs in a Christmas Eve drunken stupor while she's taking care of the house and making sure the kiddies are all snug in their beds!!!! What does she like as a special treat? (Keep it clean, this is a family place.)

Later Dude, I gotta go raz Hex, and Dan, and Blade, and Basil, and .......... well, you get the idea!!!

Ho ho fucking ho. Merry Christmas.

Bahhhhhhhhhh, humbug!! Come on January!!!

[Loudpipes78]

Yeah Dude, I'm still watching. You may wish I wasn't though!!! He he he
Hey, I've been in contact with your pal Guado to see if he was serious that you preferred peach flavored. Suuuuuuup wit dat shit Man??

Anyway, different strokes for different folks, whatever blows yer hair back, ya know, all that stuff.

So ya like the Patel sticks, eh?? Think yer man enough to handle an Edge Lite?? They're pretty strong smokes for a young'un ya know!!! I'll have to see what the elves have laying around from that place. Also, you want to try some of the product from that place you ain't supposed to have any from?? Well, it just so happens that the North Pole is fairly close to Canada where they're legal. Just have to get 'em under the Customs radar, if ya know what I mean.

OK, we got you covered. How about the Saint you sleep with. What does she like? I sure as hell ain't sending you something without sending her something too. I mean, she might leave a little treat for Santa. You; you'll probably just be sawing logs in a Christmas Eve drunken stupor while she's taking care of the house and making sure the kiddies are all snug in their beds!!!! What does she like as a special treat? (Keep it clean, this is a family place.)

Later Dude, I gotta go raz Hex, and Dan, and Blade, and Basil, and .......... well, you get the idea!!!

Ho ho fucking ho. Merry Christmas.

Bahhhhhhhhhh, humbug!! Come on January!!!

An Edge Lite? That sounds interesting.

My dear wifey... she is really into wine and normally goes with a good Riesling or Conundrum... I hope my whiskey swillin' self spelled those right. She is also into 80's music and LOVES Journey. We both appreciate the arts and she enjoys going to museums, galleries, etc. She does smoke but normally it's those God awful Splash cloves or little chocolate flavored cigarillos. On occasion if I'm having a cigar that I think she might like she'll have a puff or 2 but usually she wants nothing more than that. Geeesh... I'm sitting here realizing how truly multi-faceted she is because while enjoying wine and being really girly at she'll also go out dancing and slam down 3 shots of Patron before she goes to shake her groove thang or can hang tough with the boys and do a shot of Wild Turkey.

Making sure the kiddies are tucked in? Santa... I think you're watching the wrong house... there are no kids in our humble abode, nor are there plans for any. We have a dog, cat, and fish which are more than enough for us.

If there is anything else please let me know.

P.s. I hope you're in decent shape because even though we're in Florida we do have a chimney.

[Secret Santa]

LP, you don't have to worry about Santa fitting down your chimney. Ever see a mouse fit through a 1/2" hole?? (How the fuck do they do that anyway??)

Anyhow, the jury is still out on you my friend. I have 12 drunk & stoned elves sequestered in a room trying to make up their minds on what we should fill your stocking with. We thought we were all set and then you pull that little stunt on the weekend?? ROTFLMMFFAO!!! You think Santa didn't see that??

Also, nice choice of gifts for the wife at Fredricks of Hollywood!! I'll bet she's gonna look sharp in that. Think she'll really put it on?

Hey, listen, times gettin' close now for me to send the package. I don't want to send it to you early because Santa knows that you ain't left a gift unopened since you were like 3 or something. This shouldn't be opened 'till Christmas morning. Capiche?? (Yeah, like that ain't falling on deaf ears!!!)

Whatever.

Take care, and keep a look out for a package addressed to your missus early next week. She'll make sure it isn't opened 'till the 25th!!!

Yours,

Santa

[Secret Santa]

Good Morning Michael.

You're mission for today, should you choose to accept .............................. shit, wrong guy.

Let's try this again.

Good morning Michael.

You're package left via USPS Priority Post early yesterday. You may see it tomorrow, but maybe not 'till Tuesday. Either way, hope you and the Missus enjoy the contents (lol, I know you will Dude, I'm not sure about her tastes & preferences).

DC # 0306 2400 0000 6830 6947.

Take care, all the best, and you and yours have a very Merry Christmas!!

Santa.

[Loudpipes78]

Good Morning Michael.

You're mission for today, should you choose to accept .............................. shit, wrong guy.

Let's try this again.

Good morning Michael.

You're package left via USPS Priority Post early yesterday. You may see it tomorrow, but maybe not 'till Tuesday. Either way, hope you and the Missus enjoy the contents (lol, I know you will Dude, I'm not sure about her tastes & preferences).

DC # 0306 2400 0000 6830 6947.

Take care, all the best, and you and yours have a very Merry Christmas!!

Santa.

DAMNIT! Santa you're slippin'!!!! I guess your naughty radar is majorly fuxored. I've had an insanely busy weekend and didn't have a chance to get on here to try to stop you from sending the package out.

My wife is leaving me, ur... I'm leaving her for being a cheater... I dunno... read my other post that I am going to write in a minute. The long and the short of it is I am getting divorced and will be picking up the papers in the morning to file.

I will respect your wishes and not open the present until Christmas because right now it will most likely be the only thing under my tree.

Thank you so much in advance, I am sure it's everything I wanted and probably on point for what she would have liked even though she doesn't deserve it at all.

[Secret Santa]

Michael, I don't know what to say Pal except for Santa feels like a real bag of shit right now.

Go ahead and open the package when you get it, there's a "few" items in there that will help you feel a little better. It wasn't packaged for a 2 week storage anyway.

Take care, keep your chin up. What's past is past. It's done and there aion't nuttin' can be done about it. Look forward to moving on to the next stage!!!

[Loudpipes78]

Michael, I don't know what to say Pal except for Santa feels like a real bag of shit right now.

Go ahead and open the package when you get it, there's a "few" items in there that will help you feel a little better. It wasn't packaged for a 2 week storage anyway.

Take care, keep your chin up. What's past is past. It's done and there aion't nuttin' can be done about it. Look forward to moving on to the next stage!!!

Santa,

There is no reason to feel like shit about this, it's not your fault that your naughty-scope is broken. I actually regret making my last post but it's to late now.

Just keep on spreading that holiday joy because I know that my problems may seem bad to me but there are others in way worse spots. I actually made a fairly big donation to a bell ringer at the grocery store the other night and I am personally trying to share as much Christmas joy as I can.

'tis the Season and all that.

[guado]

Santa,

There is no reason to feel like shit about this, it's not your fault that your naughty-scope is broken. I actually regret making my last post but it's to late now.

Just keep on spreading that holiday joy because I know that my problems may seem bad to me but there are others in way worse spots. I actually made a fairly big donation to a bell ringer at the grocery store the other night and I am personally trying to share as much Christmas joy as I can.

'tis the Season and all that.

Mike-a-palooza!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Loudpipes78]

HOLY FUCK!!!!!

I just opened the Brandy Beans and had one... then 2... then 3,4,5, and 6.

They are AWESOME!!!!!!!

I actually stopped what I was doing so I could come upstairs and post this. REALLY REALLY AWESOME!!!!

Thanks so much!!!!