Opinions needed

[forgop]

Just a little scenario to see if anyone agrees with me on this or not...

Wife and I will have been married for 8 years in 3 weeks. She has a brother who is 39 and will be getting married this fall. When we got married, he was an usher and part of the arrangement was that all of the tux's were paid for and we contributed half of the cost of the bridesmaid dresses, which maybe amounted to a $50-75 cost for the girls to buy and keep obviously.

Fast forward to today, we are both considerably much better off financially, although he's now pulling in around $150k and the fiance to be is probably making $60k+ at least. They've only been together 6 months and she's asked my wife to be in the wedding. She originally said something about not being picky and wanting to allow the girls to wear whatever style dress she wants as long as it was a certain color. Now, by B-I-L has decided that he wants a specific dress for everyone to buy, which would probably be $150.

While I make a pretty decent income myself, we are living on solely my income while my wife stays home with our 3 kids(4,2, and 3 weeks old). Am I crazy to think someone with more than twice our household income should help pay for the dress if she's going to be in it in this case? I'm literally of the opinion that I'll stay home if they expect us to foot the whole bill.

What would you do in this situation?

[CgarDan]

I don't know how it works usually but every wedding that I have been to the wedding party pays for all the bridesmaides dresses and all the grooms party tuxes.

[nhcigarfan]

Usually the women buy their own dresses.

Here's my opinion.

What's worth more, paying $150 bucks and not adding this little hair across the ass of the groom and bride to be and all the tension that goes with it (remember how much of a pain getting married was)

or 75 bucks.

Personally, I'd just buy the dress and forget about it.

[FunkyCold5]

Actually it varies from wedding to wedding. There's really no right or wrong way.

My GFs brother married last year and they paid for all the rooms in this bed and breakfast they stayed in for all the close family, pastor, and bridesmaids & groomsmen. They just wanted to, even though they already have all the wedding expenses to take care of.

3 recent weddings I went to this past year, all the bridesmaids and groomsmen had to pay for dresses and tux out of pocket.

Sorry for your dilema.

[wh0re]

Actually it varies from wedding to wedding. There's really no right or wrong way.

My GFs brother married last year and they paid for all the rooms in this bed and breakfast they stayed in for all the close family, pastor, and bridesmaids & groomsmen. They just wanted to, even though they already have all the wedding expenses to take care of.

3 recent weddings I went to this past year, all the bridesmaids and groomsmen had to pay for dresses and tux out of pocket.

Sorry for your dilema.

Ya, it's really up to the people paying for it which way they would like to go. I agree with nhcigarfan though, I don't think this is something that's worth putting a rift in the relationship over.

[mills]

Personally, when we got married, all the bridesmaids got their own dresses, which I definitely think works the best. However, I'm going to go with the consensus here and say that the 75ish bucks is definitely not worth all the drama. Buy it, wear it, sell it on ebay.

[The Korean]

I have been a a couple weddings plus mine, for each, the bridesmaids/groomsmen bought/rented themselves. I know the principle is big for you, but IMO it's not worth what hassle it will cause.