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Thread: Rookie Mugging

  1. #1
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    Default Rookie Mugging

    A rookie tried to mug me today. I was at work late tonight for inventory, and I ended up taking my break around nine or ten PM. I left the mall where I work to walk a block or so to a nearby Baja Fresh (a slightly upscale Taco Bell), and, after placing my order, I went to the bathroom to take a piss and wash up. The bathroom at Baja is in the very back of the place, and divided from the rest of the restaurant. When I opened the door to walk out, a young black guy wearing a big hooded jacket forced me into a corner and told me in a low voice, "You're going to take out your wallet and give me everything inside of it, or there's going to be an issue." He said it so low and so gruffy that I had to ask him to repeat himself. After confirming that he did intend to rob me, I told him flatly to his face that there was absolutely no fucking way that I'd simply hand over the money that I worked my ass off for. My mere resistance and failure to comply seemed to startle him, and he asked me in somewhat of a nervous voice if he was going to need to pull something out of his jacket (presumably a blade or gun). I maintained that I worked hard for my loot, and suggested that he get a job of his own. While saying this, I stepped diagonally to the side so as to get out of the corner. This further resistance seemed to further decrease his resolution, and he then tried to come up with several excuses (including how he had just gotten fired, and how he hadn't eaten in some time). I asked him flatly if he intended on shanking me over a few bucks, and the noob then admitted that he didn't even have a weapon on him. However, he still demanded money. I told him (facetiously, of course) that if he wanted a job, he could follow me back to work and talk to my manager. I also told him that if he was hungry, he could have a bite of the black beans that came with my meal. This seemed to piss him off, and he became ever-so-slightly more angry and aggressive. At this point I figured he was too much of a pussy and/or rookie to actually get in a physical scuffle with me, so I turned my back to him and walked back to the main restaurant. He followed right beside me like a shadow, all the while making low threats combined with weak excuses for wanting to take my money. I eventually made my way to the counter, and, apparently sensing that I wasn't interested in any more of his bullshit, he made a final offer of accepting a dollar or two of mine in order to take the bus home. I told him I'd give that all of the thought it deserved, which laughably seemed to give him a bit of hope. He left the store and began to pace back and forth outside, which I assumed to be his way of feigning an a threat to jump me when I exited the store. After getting my food, I left the restaurant with my chow and started to walk back to work. He chased right after me, and began resuming his weak threats/excuses. After finally hearing enough, I removed the bus transfer ticket that I had gotten on the way to work (when you pay for bus fare, you get a ticket that's good for 3-4 hours for free further bus rides), and gave it to him (since I already had a ride home from work and wouldn't have needed it) with a few words of my own. I told him to his face what I thought of him and people like him. I told him that he was a coward in more ways than one. I told him that he was a piece of shit. He accepted these words with a few nods, and took the transfer and headed to the bus stop. He then turned around and offered me his hand to shake, as if we had merely completed a business-like transaction. Needless to say, I was completely speechless at this guy's audacity, so I just shook my head in disbelief and headed back to work to eat my dinner.

    Unfortunately, Maryland doesn't offer a concealed carry license unless you're an ultra high-risk person. I guess I'm either going to need to land my internship, or start carrying knife when I go to work. Weak.

  2. #2
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    Dude that is a fantastic story. The guy came away with a bus pass and you came away with that story to tell at parties. I think you won. LOL. Seriously the stupidity of some people.
    "I'm a leaf on the wind watch how I soar."
    Hoban Washburn


  3. #3
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    Sounds like the perp's lucky he got a bus ticket and not an ass whoopin. Nice story.

  4. #4
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    Great job handling the situation, it could have gone a lot worse.
    "If you look for truth, you may find comfort in the end; if you look for comfort you will not get either comfort or truth only soft soap and wishful thinking to begin, and in the end, despair." -C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

  5. #5

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    I think I just got mugged by a wall of text. Lets get some paragraphs next time rookie

    Still, I read it and agree it's a good story. A friend of mine lives by the philosophy that he'll do or go through anything as long as he gets a good story out of it.

  6. #6
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    Wow, very good story. I'm glad it turned out on a good note, and nothing bad. It's sad what people resort to for a little money. Just becareful, if it's the same guy, he may actually have a weapon next time.

    Andrew

  7. #7
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    Hahaha great story. Good job man!

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by WOXOF View Post
    Sounds like the perp's lucky he got a bus ticket and not an ass whoopin.

    WHHEEEEEWW !!! MISSISSIPPI !!! GIT-R-DONE !!!
    Originally Posted by Heftysmokes:
    Maybe I should do a movie review on Apollo 13 and tell you all "that's as real as it gets" since I'm a fucking astronaut.

  9. #9

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    What's funny is you are in Washington DC. any other city you could have shot is ass and been done with it.

    On a good note at least you were not hurt.

  10. #10
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    I <3 florida. You threaten me I shoot you...yay!

    Good story and even more bad ass becuase the guy turned out to be a huge pussy.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Merlin390 View Post
    What's funny is you are in Washington DC. any other city you could have shot is ass and been done with it.

    On a good note at least you were not hurt.
    You were never in any danger. Don't you know that guns are illegal in Washington DC - It's the safest area in the country

  12. #12

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    Quote Originally Posted by Shelby07 View Post
    You were never in any danger. Don't you know that guns are illegal in Washington DC - It's the safest area in the country
    That was kind of my point. DC has one of the highest murder rates in the US. I just find it funny where in a city like DC you cant have a pistol and the murder rate is high but in states what have CC laws the murder numbers and violent crime numbers overall are lower.

    I do like your sarcasm though. It reminds me of an article I read here recently where a Senator was mugged and in the course of his service he had always voted against bills that would arm citizens and now as a result of his attack he is arming himself and his wife. Now my only concern is they shoot themselves.

  13. #13
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    Default Uh, what?

    I hate to be the dissenter here, but after this guy attempts (feebly, admittedly) to rob you you give him a bus pass and don't call the police on him? So after it's all over he still got something out of you and trots off after he has the friggin' gall to offer you his hand? I can bet you he will do the same thing to someone else but instead of it being someone capable of handling themselves it will be an old lady or some such. Dude, at least make a report or something.

    I don't mean to sound like I'm coming down hard on you, man, but this guy sounds like a scumbag and needs to be dealt with.

    TampaSupremo
    "Ph-nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!"-H.P. Lovecraft


  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by TampaSupremo View Post
    I hate to be the dissenter here, but after this guy attempts (feebly, admittedly) to rob you you give him a bus pass and don't call the police on him? So after it's all over he still got something out of you and trots off after he has the friggin' gall to offer you his hand? I can bet you he will do the same thing to someone else but instead of it being someone capable of handling themselves it will be an old lady or some such. Dude, at least make a report or something.

    I don't mean to sound like I'm coming down hard on you, man, but this guy sounds like a scumbag and needs to be dealt with.

    TampaSupremo
    That's one thing I kind of wish I had done in retrospect (called the police), for two reasons - what you mentioned above, and to give me credibility in any future situations. For the most part, however, dealing with LEOs around here can generally prove to be a giant ordeal. At the time the event happened, I was just as happy to put it behind me and get on with my life, rather than going through the hassle of calling a LEO, potentially going to the police station to file a formal report, etc. Besides, other than a vague description of the perpetrator (5'8-5'10, anywhere from 170-200lbs, dark skinned, wearing a coat), I couldn't have been of any use.

  15. #15
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    I would have camera phone'd his face, then called the cops while I watch him bolt out the door.

    Watch yourself out there JFellows.

  16. #16

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    Damit JFellows. You should have kicked some ass. And if you want that CCW you should have filed a police report (I think that would be considered a threat and MD might issue the CCW). Oh well it seems pretty funny that someone was that stupid would try and rob you, least everything worked out. (just curious where in Maryland did this happen)

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by 597 View Post
    Damit JFellows. You should have kicked some ass. And if you want that CCW you should have filed a police report (I think that would be considered a threat and MD might issue the CCW). Oh well it seems pretty funny that someone was that stupid would try and rob you, least everything worked out. (just curious where in Maryland did this happen)
    Yeah yeah yeah...oh well...maybe I'll have another noob try and mug me again next week, haha. I'm in Bethesda, right outside of DC.

  18. Default

    I know what I would have done...He would have seen the business end of my little buddies Mr. Smith and Mr. Wesson. But I can carry legally and you can't. DC is so messed up.

    You got out of it unhurt which is the best you can ask out of that situation. I would have called Law Enforcment. You might have done so in enough time to get the guy. My fear is this guy will arm himself and continue to rob folks...This time with a real edge.

  19. #19

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    Well, if he tried that shit on me, I hope I would have the balls to pull my concealed handgun and remove him from this planet before he finds someone small and weak and beats them half to death or kills them to get their money.
    There's only two kinds of cigars, the kind you like and the kind you don't.

  20. #20

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    One of my side arms.

    My other side arm (worn mostly in warm weather on an ankle holster or in a pocket holster)

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