Never Used LORD PUFFER Cigar Ashtray For Sale

**ashauler** · 12-04-2007, 11:44 AM

Originally Posted by WOXOF

You're right, you don't need to teach me economics, and yes my offer was meant to be insulting.

As far as garage sales go, I'll be cruising the streets this weekend to do some Christmas shopping. My wife wants some new undies for Christmas. Who knows, maybe I'll come across a puff daddy ashtray for 50 cents.

Hey WOXOF, while you're hitting up the garage sales I'm in the market for some unused .39 stamps........If you see any, please pick them up for me and I'll make it worth your while. My e-bay rating is non-existent, so I would be willing to send my end first should you score.

Shelby07,
I'll take your stamps.......and what sizes of udies do you have available? Male underware that is.....and none of those ball squishing bikini's, strictly boxers for me so the boys can get some air.

**chefchris** · 12-04-2007, 11:52 AM

Does anyone have an Ebay rating for sale? Mine is terrible and when I advertise randomly on boards, people don't trust me. I am looking for as close to 100% as I can get. Post inquiries here.

**bigwhiteash** · 12-04-2007, 11:53 AM

dang... I came here looking for an ashtray! seems all I can find are stamps and underwear

**WOXOF** · 12-04-2007, 11:58 AM

Originally Posted by chefchris

Does anyone have an Ebay rating for sale? Mine is terrible and when I advertise randomly on boards, people don't trust me. I am looking for as close to 100% as I can get. Post inquiries here.

Nope sorry, mine sucks too.

**Shelby07** · 12-04-2007, 12:06 PM

There's a family of 9 down the street a ways - they are my "stretchers" - they can stretch to fit anywhere from a 30 to at 50" waist. My most popular size seems to be a 34". Francisco is a perfect 34 and he only has to wear them for 5 days before I can send them out. If you want a larger size they take a little longer.

Let me know quick! Only 21 more days till Christmas.

**WOXOF** · 12-04-2007, 12:08 PM

I need a women's size 6. No skid marks!

**WOXOF** · 12-04-2007, 12:09 PM

Better make that a size 8 with the holidays and all.

**Shelby07** · 12-04-2007, 12:29 PM

Originally Posted by WOXOF

I need a women's size 6. No skid marks!

I have received your request to upsize to an 8 for the holidays. That will be no problem. However, I am a high volume ebay power seller. The "no skid marks" may be a problem. Because my product is in such high demand I rarely have time to launder them before I ship them out using secure e-bay packaging. This is usually not a problem with most of my customers. I will do my best to have my ladies size 8 stretcher (Ralph) bathe every few days as he stretches your women's underwear, but just so you know, there is a strict no return policy on all undergarments.

Having met you this past summer, I doubt you would fit into a size 8. Since I can't guarantee no skid marks I will waive the supersize up charge for you this one time. Value and customer service like this is why my ebay buyers love me so much.

Are you sure you wouldn't rather have an ashtray? or stamps?

**Shelby07** · 12-04-2007, 12:42 PM

Originally Posted by ashauler

Shelby07,
I'll take your stamps.......and what sizes of udies do you have available? Male underware that is.....and none of those ball squishing bikini's, strictly boxers for me so the boys can get some air.

Your stamps are on the way. I an sending a complimentary pair of our XLSP (Extra Large Sack Pack) one-size-fits-all men's underwear for you to examine. I think you will like them. Don't worry too much about the hard crusty yellow substance in the front. They help to protect the undergarments in the area where they are most susceptible to wear. This feature has become a real favorite with the savvy ebay buyer market.

Oh yeah, To save on shipping charges I used a couple of the stamps... but don't worry, that shouldn't affect the future collector value. Remember, these are not available any more.

**Shelby07** · 12-04-2007, 12:49 PM

Lord Puffer - Since I have sold the 39 cent stamps I will have to withdraw my offer to purchase your ash tray. I am very sorry and I hope this will not affect my ebay rating. I wish you good luck in selling your one of a kind, ultra rare ash tray on ebay. I'm sure there is an ash tray collector out there who needs one of them to complete his collection.

Have you considered Southby's or Christie's auction houses?

lordpuffer · 12-04-2007, 01:04 PM

You guys think that you are so funny and witty. Ya know what, I won't post any more items to sell anymore. You guys can ash your cigar in your cigarette ashtrays like all other guys with no class. If I come across a bundle of cigars for 25 cents each, I will post them and have you guys crawling all over me to purchase them. That comes directly from the lord....lordpuffer that is. Now, I'm going to go up to the roof on this beautiful California day, bang my girlfriend in the jacuzzi and then smoke a fucking cigar. What are you losers doing today?

**derivation** · 12-04-2007, 01:08 PM

Originally Posted by lordpuffer

Now, I'm going to go up to the roof on this beautiful California day, bang my girlfriend in the jacuzzi and then smoke a fucking cigar. What are you losers doing today?

Well, not lying for one. Or being a douche.

**Shelby07** · 12-04-2007, 01:11 PM

Originally Posted by lordpuffer

You guys think that you are so funny and witty. Ya know what, I won't post any more items to sell anymore. You guys can ash your cigar in your cigarette ashtrays like all other guys with no class. If I come across a bundle of cigars for 25 cents each, I will post them and have you guys crawling all over me to purchase them. That comes directly from the lord....lordpuffer that is. Now, I'm going to go up to the roof on this beautiful California day, bang my girlfriend in the jacuzzi and then smoke a fucking cigar. What are you losers doing today?

Awwww shit! I hate it when a plan backfires!

In the words of the immortal ash tray nazi...

NO ASH TRAY FOR YOU!

EDIT: By the way, LP, can your girlfriend use some undergarments?

**chefchris** · 12-04-2007, 01:19 PM

Originally Posted by lordpuffer

You guys think that you are so funny and witty. Ya know what, I won't post any more items to sell anymore. You guys can ash your cigar in your cigarette ashtrays like all other guys with no class. If I come across a bundle of cigars for 25 cents each, I will post them and have you guys crawling all over me to purchase them. That comes directly from the lord....lordpuffer that is. Now, I'm going to go up to the roof on this beautiful California day, bang my girlfriend in the jacuzzi and then smoke a fucking cigar. What are you losers doing today?

wow, that was an awesome reply. pure gold. i don't even know what to say.

nice breakdown.

**ashauler** · 12-04-2007, 01:21 PM

Originally Posted by Shelby07

Your stamps are on the way. I an sending a complimentary pair of our XLSP (Extra Large Sack Pack) one-size-fits-all men's underwear for you to examine. I think you will like them. Don't worry too much about the hard crusty yellow substance in the front. They help to protect the undergarments in the area where they are most susceptible to wear. This feature has become a real favorite with the savvy ebay buyer market.

Oh yeah, To save on shipping charges I used a couple of the stamps... but don't worry, that shouldn't affect the future collector value. Remember, these are not available any more.

Whippee!!! I can't wait to try the new innovation in underware, the only reason I'm shopping is because the frontal area alway seems to fray and wear out.

Perhaps some of the stamps being used will increase their value over time, seeing as how they survived our postal system.

**nhcigarfan** · 12-04-2007, 01:23 PM

Originally Posted by lordpuffer

I'm going to go up to the roof on this beautiful California day, bang my girlfriend in the jacuzzi and then smoke a fucking cigar. What are you losers doing today?

If this was actually true you wouldn't be wasting your time trying to sell that cheap ass ashtray.

Or wasting your time with this thread.

**ashauler** · 12-04-2007, 01:23 PM

Originally Posted by lordpuffer

You guys think that you are so funny and witty. Ya know what, I won't post any more items to sell anymore. You guys can ash your cigar in your cigarette ashtrays like all other guys with no class. If I come across a bundle of cigars for 25 cents each, I will post them and have you guys crawling all over me to purchase them. That comes directly from the lord....lordpuffer that is. Now, I'm going to go up to the roof on this beautiful California day, bang my girlfriend in the jacuzzi and then smoke a fucking cigar. What are you losers doing today?

Wow, I'm gonna go pout.

LP, you probably deserve Kudos for being able to bang your girlfriend in the hot tub......I bet its a bitch chasing her inflateable ass around the tub.

**Shelby07** · 12-04-2007, 01:23 PM

Originally Posted by chefchris

wow, that was an awesome reply. pure gold. i don't even know what to say.

nice breakdown.

I can't wait for the 25 cent cigar bundle. Maybe we can all agree not to go crawling all over each other and bid the price up too high. How about a bundle split or something.

**WOXOF** · 12-04-2007, 01:37 PM

Originally Posted by lordpuffer

You guys think that you are so funny and witty. Ya know what, I won't post any more items to sell anymore. You guys can ash your cigar in your cigarette ashtrays like all other guys with no class. If I come across a bundle of cigars for 25 cents each, I will post them and have you guys crawling all over me to purchase them. That comes directly from the lord....lordpuffer that is. Now, I'm going to go up to the roof on this beautiful California day, bang my girlfriend in the jacuzzi and then smoke a fucking cigar. What are you losers doing today?

Cigar ashtray: free with box purchase

Lord puffer limited edition ashtray: $30

Lord puffer meltdown and hissy fit: Priceless

**Shelby07** · 12-04-2007, 01:39 PM

Originally Posted by ashauler

Wow, I'm gonna go pout.

LP, you probably deserve Kudos for being able to bang your girlfriend in the hot tub......I bet its a bitch chasing her inflateable ass around the tub.

Make a tiny little pinhole in her ass and you can play "Who made the bubbles" in your tub!