Things To Do at a Target / Wal-Mart

**godfather** · 09-09-2005, 02:06 PM

...while waiting for your spouse / friend....

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!

14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

**TheSilentChamber** · 09-09-2005, 02:18 PM

Wow... this is old. Still somewhat humorus though.

**godfather** · 09-09-2005, 02:22 PM

Sorry, I at least did a search to see if the thread was posted and it wasn't :).

Someone sent this to me at work today....:)

**Bkcloud114** · 09-09-2005, 10:34 PM

Roflmao

**nhcigarfan** · 09-10-2005, 08:21 AM

I like #3

but use brown gravey

**labmonkey** · 09-13-2005, 09:22 AM

Originally Posted by nhcigarfan

I like #3

but use brown gravey

dude....your demented!!!!

**stjohnroe** · 09-13-2005, 09:49 AM

I let off a tremendously loud fart in a Wegmans while I was in the States last month, would have thought I had pulled the pinn on a hand grenade from the looks I got. Then again the fart was a bit of a trouser ripper

.

**cigar no baka** · 09-13-2005, 11:42 AM

A few weeks ago I gave up my leather chair at a Smoke Ring event so someone else could sit down. I wandered into the humidor with my drink in one hand, cigar in the other to just look around. Seconds later both owners come in laughing, going "Man you're breaking the first rule of cigar etiquette, no drinks in the humidor!". So I said, "Oh I'm sorry I just needed to fart" then ripped off a big wet one. Both of them were practically on the floor laughing their asses off, saying "that's not OK either!!"

**godfather** · 09-13-2005, 11:44 AM

Originally Posted by cigar no baka

"Man you're breaking the first rule of cigar etiquette, no drinks in the humidor!". So I said, "Oh I'm sorry I just needed to fart" then ripped off a big wet one. Both of them were practically on the floor laughing their asses off, saying "that's not OK either!!"

LMAO!!!!