Top 10: Most Dangerous Toys of All-Time

[cigarsarge]

They had Jr. High schools back in the Paleozoic era? j/k

You think you're so damn clever. Now take this...

[preembargo]

Oh that’s some funny Stuff! I remember most of those toys. (I hear you can still get the ‘Nuclear Holocaust Lab’ in Pakistan and Iran.)

I had to list some of my favorite quotes from the article.

“Lawn darts were massive weighted spears. You threw them. They stuck where they landed. If they happened to land in your skull, well, then you should have moved.”

“The best part about Jarts was that they eliminated all speculation from true outdoor fun. (Is this dangerous? Hell yes, now chuck it!”

“Sadly, today's underage boys will never know the primal excitement of a summer's evening spent impaling friends before suppertime.”



“Among the banned EZ products were Hangouts Baby Hammocks, or "Baby's First Death Cocoon," woven from thin cotton and nylon strings.”


“Nearly nine million Sky Dancers were eventually recalled, leaving aspiring ballerinas to earn their battle scars the old fashioned way, with an eating disorder.”


“Nothing says safety like an open hot plate.”


"We'll all be gay when Johnny comes marching home!" OMG!!! TOOOO FUNNY!!!

” Presumably, the child on the motorcycle was then taken on a hellish, intestine-twisting scream ride. At one point, he or she would face choices unthinkable except in an Evel Knievel meets Knightrider crossover episode: Do I jump? Or do I ride it out and see if I can clear the gully? Is it sentient? Can it be reasoned with?”


“Dancers are now advised to use the fun sphere for no longer than four hours at a time, which is about four hours longer than any kid should be disco-ing. The real danger here is probably less to dancing children than to the transfixed pot smoker.”