some of my favorites that i cant find right now went something like...
Today, I got back to my scooter to find that someone had stolen my side mirrors. Where were the cops? 500 yards down the street to pull me over for not having mirrors on my vehicle...
Today, I helped my son with his math homework. He got a C, and isn't talking to me anymore.
Today, at a rehearsal, a friend poked me: "My mother is in the orchestra, guess who she is!" I jokingly answer: "Erm…The fat singer?". It was. FML
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