Quote Originally Posted by CoventryCat86
God, Please Make It Stop!!!
Let me just say this much, wrong or right.

I am out of my league on this board. Most of the BOTL here at CS are head and shoulders above my level of Cigar Smoker. I have never felt like I belonged here, even when I wasn't the butt of somebody's joke. Let's face it, I can't run with you guys, CC has said it many times. When I first came here, I was smoking Miami Suites, that was my brand. My only good cigar had been a Don Carlos given to me as a wedding gift. That is how I found CS. I was trying to find out what I had smoked by looking it up on the web. I ended up at CF, by accident. There is where I saw a sig line that said "I usually hang out at CS" so I checked it out. And that is that. I never made any secret of my level in this hobby. I went to the cigar shop to get fodder for every pass I was ever in. I thought I could pay my dues and grow into this hobby with you guys. Well I tried, the dues are too high for me. After I had to leave my job on disability it goy harder. So this I suppose is the end of the road. But don't anybody say I am telling you this to mooch. I don't want your pity or your cigars. Why do you think I took my addy out of my profile? CC, I only ask that you leave me be. I have never done a damn thing to you, and this is just wrong.

At LTC, I am on a level in this hobby that is at least as advanced as the best of the guys over there. And I have developed some friendships. I have enough knowledge of this hobby to actually have useful input there, not just comic relief.

So if you guys don't mind a whole lot, how bout you let me enjoy participating at a level I can be useful, instead of always feeling like I ain't good enough to be. I just ask you to let me be, that is all.

I admit I have made many mistakes. I have made errors in judgment, errong on the side of the guy who was at the bottom(a habit I gave up flat a while back, you can't show otherwise). I have been the recipient of the generosity of many fine brothers on CigarPass, and I thank them (you guys know who you are and I owe you plenty). I have never from the day I got here been able to be a gifter, and I have never made out like I could (I would love to be a bomber, instead of the charity case, with the care packages from time to time). Have I mooched cigars? I have jokingly made mooch attempts, when it seemed appropriate for the climate of the thread. But I never intended to commit acts of fraud. I never set out to hurt or swindle anyone. And I always tried to do my best to be more than fair in passes that I was in.

I cannot for the life of me find anything I have done to Justify CC or anyone else coming to this new board and trying to slander me, and telling my new friends that I am a scumbag. That isn't right and it is downright unjustifiable. I will be more than happy to stay away from here, and not soil the great CS membership any further. I just ask that if anybody really thinks I deserve a character assassination, you would show me why.

I am not asking you to open your arms to me, to accept me as a brother (though many of you kind brothers and sisters did just that). I am only asking that you don't try to crush me under the weight of the past, or my inadequacies.


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