This Sucks

**WhiteWidow** · 02-13-2006, 05:49 PM

Originally Posted by drew_goring

lol...mail order bride?

I don't know if she was or not. All I know is she came from out of left field, and they got married like 3 months later. She's been around for about a year and half now, which I will admit impresses me.

**nhcigarfan** · 02-13-2006, 06:25 PM

Hey - I went through something very similar with my college girl friend. I didn't buy the ring, and I'm glad I didn't. Once we were out on our own, away from college, I realized that during college we were great for each other, after that, not so much. Haven't seen here in 10 years. Haven't missed her. I met my wife 9 years ago.

Just a thought, don't rush into it. You have a lot going on and there is no reason to add to it.

If you feel you need to give her something, I recommend following Cinda's advice.

**SuperChuck** · 02-14-2006, 07:39 AM

Originally Posted by nhcigarfan

Hey - I went through something very similar with my college girl friend. I didn't buy the ring, and I'm glad I didn't. Once we were out on our own, away from college, I realized that during college we were great for each other, after that, not so much. Haven't seen here in 10 years. Haven't missed her. I met my wife 9 years ago.

I was going to mention the same thing... Leaving college is a major life change. Very often, life changes are very jarring to relationships.

Originally Posted by prophetic_joe

I understand the girl being mad at you because you told her you were going to buy her a nice ring and instead bought cigars and video games but when it comes down to it it is your money so the hell with it.

How much of her income does she spend on you? These things tend to be terribly one-sided.

I probably sound like a total killjoy, but I was in one of those relationships, too. We dated for 2 years in college, then lived together for about 3 after college. Then a whole bunch of things started to change in our lives and we went our separate ways.

I eventually became a confirmed bachelor and then ANOTHER woman waltzes into my life and makes me feel wonderful. Goddamn women. :)

**Bkcloud114** · 02-14-2006, 09:14 AM

WW...... Dude trust me, if she is pressuring you into giving her a ring and getting married, ex: "I want a ring, I want to get married".... she is probably more interesterd in the idea of marriage and the monetary value of "a ring". She is probably in her early 20's and all of her friends are starting to get married and she might start feeling left out. IMO if she truly loves you and not loves the idea of marriage, she will understand.

If the two of you are "truly in love"...... go to the local City Hall and get married..... My first marriage cost a ton of money (Father-in-law paid), I mean a ton of money.... that wedding lasted 4 yrs. My second marriage was to my current wife . We both swore we weren't gonna get married ever again. I gave her a small ring after about 1 yr together, got married 1 yr later, spent LESS THAN $5,000 for the wedding (I have a big family)..... we will be married forever, she is great !!

**ukyfan** · 02-14-2006, 10:30 AM

Originally Posted by Bkcloud114

WW...... Dude trust me, if she is pressuring you into giving her a ring and getting married, ex: "I want a ring, I want to get married".... she is probably more interesterd in the idea of marriage and the monetary value of "a ring". She is probably in her early 20's and all of her friends are starting to get married and she might start feeling left out. IMO if she truly loves you and not loves the idea of marriage, she will understand.

If the two of you are "truly in love"...... go to the local City Hall and get married..... My first marriage cost a ton of money (Father-in-law paid), I mean a ton of money.... that wedding lasted 4 yrs. My second marriage was to my current wife . We both swore we weren't gonna get married ever again. I gave her a small ring after about 1 yr together, got married 1 yr later, spent LESS THAN $5,000 for the wedding (I have a big family)..... we will be married forever, she is great !!

Yeah I agree with BC. I think my wife and I spent about the same amount on our wedding. Small little ceremony with only our parents, her grandparents, and my brother and sister in law. If she really wants to be married, take a trip to Vegas and get married at "The Little White Wedding Chappel", and spend the rest of your cash at the slots or tables

. Would make for a lot of conversation in the future.

**WhiteWidow** · 02-14-2006, 10:40 AM

Originally Posted by ukyfan

Yeah I agree with BC. I think my wife and I spent about the same amount on our wedding. Small little ceremony with only our parents, her grandparents, and my brother and sister in law. If she really wants to be married, take a trip to Vegas and get married at "The Little White Wedding Chappel", and spend the rest of your cash at the slots or tables

. Would make for a lot of conversation in the future.

We were in Vegas last year and I recomended that, but she pussed out.

Another thing I would like to mention is that there's not a question of if I'm going to mary this woman, that's already been decided. The problem here I guess is just how to go about doing it.